When I came across the idea of doing a post on self-worth, I hesitated. Why? Well, it’s difficult feeling worthy all the time, especially when you can’t let go of the past and everything about it that made you feel like garbage. I hesitated because deep down, I was scared to let go. I knew that then I’d have to start over. I’d have to learn how to look in the mirror and actually like what I would see. Crazy right? Well, no. There could still be a part of you that wants to sabotage the relationship you could have with yourself. It’s not because of past hatred, but because it’s an almost natural response for your body to reject change, even if it could benefit you.
So, here’s what you do. Fight all those instincts that want change out of the way, fight all those feelings that keep telling you that you’re not worth it, fight all those thoughts on the past, stand up straight, and tell yourself that you are enough, you are worth fighting for, and you can do this no matter what.
To make this process a little easier, I came up with some tips.
1.Be true to yourself
It’s okay to do things with your life that someone else doesn’t agree with. If you feel it’s what you want, and more importantly if you feel it’s what God wants, then go for it.
It’s also okay to chop off 8 inches of your hair if you feel more confident that way. It’s okay to wear clothes that have gone “out of style”. It’s okay to take a day off and go to the spa if you feel that that’s what you need. It’s okay to not care about what anyone else thinks of you!
I’m not telling you to be selfish, but sometimes in order to help others, you need to help yourself first.
Listening to advice is a great idea, but when you always take that advice to heart and try pleasing all the people around you, that’s when it starts to backfire. Listen to yourself, listen to God and base your decisions on that, not on all the judgment around you.
2.Upgrade your diets
That’s right, diets; plural. There’s two diets in your life you need to modify in order to start feeling worthy of yourself again. The first one is your mental diet. It’s the one where your soul and mind get fed. For example, listening to music that lifts you up is a great way to start modifying your mental state of mind, but listening to music that further depresses you will ruin your progress. Also, reading books that make you want to improve and do something positive with your life can be a great way to start feeling better about yourself again.
The second diet is the physical one. It’s actually more important than some of you might think. For me, personally, I feel my self-esteem rise when I take care of my body by eating the food it needs, not the food it wants. When your body realizes that it’s being taken care of then that’s how it will feel; taken care of, loved, worthy.
3.Do something nice for someone else
This is one of those things that has a ripple effect. If it’s by helping someone carry the groceries to their car, or volunteering at a soup kitchen, or giving someone a ride to the dentist, the results are usually the same. You start to feel worthy again, and the person you helped starts feeling the same way because someone took time to help them, which in turn makes them want to help others feel the same way, and so on.
4.Spend time with uplifting people
Okay, last one. This is kind of a no brainer. If you spend time with negative people, you in turn will start to become negative. So, if you spend time with people who have a more positive outlook on life…you guessed it; you will start to have that same outlook.
So the next time you feel your self-worth dropping for whatever reason, remember that your value doesn’t decrease by someone’s inability to see it, get back on your feet and fight for yourself!
“Not one drop of my self-worth depends on your acceptance of me.”